You Make Me Want To Be A Woman
by Lin-Hikaru-7
Summary: Handsome stranger? Check. Hero? Check. One problem. Gender confusion. Sora.x.Yazoo Crack.Drabble


You Make Me Want to Be A Woman

(Lin-Hikaru-7)

Ah Halloween Town. Where scary meant happy, and the men dressed as ladies. Err, wait, that's not right.

Anyway, a three person team had just arrived in town for a quick stopover. Well, one person, and two talking animals, actually. That's right, the adolescent keyblade wielder, the duck mage and dog knight had come-a visiting.

"Goofy! Donald! Where'd you guys go?" Sora called.

"Really Donald, it's okay that you don't wear pants! It's nothing to be ashamed of." Ah silly little boy. He blew a chocolate coloured lock out of his eyes. Apparently he still thought that Donald was still unhappy with him about that 'every day is a no pants day' Sora had made. Three hours ago. It was like Donald to hold a grudge, but it should've been obvious that he had let that remark slide. Truthfully, both the fowl and the canine were off in town square. They had been roped into an unsuccessful attempt to help Jack win Sally's heart by serenading her with bizarre gory love songs, with titles like "The Bathroom" and "As Long as you Live I Own Stock in Red Dye #5". Donald was playing the Marimba with Goofy on electric washboard.

Which left dear little Sora to wander the world aimlessly, thinking that his two friends had deserted him because of something trivial like pants. Boo hoo.

So, on a hill next to many spiny trees, the crescent moon shined, spilling onto many lavish tombstones. A common motto round those parts was "Be dead in style". That was when Sora saw her. She was staring up at the sky, and her long locks shone with eerie luminescence. Now, if that doesn't get your inner Gothic Novel raging and pulsating madly, I do not know what will. But anyway, back to the matter at hand. Sora was curious; he had never seen another non-decomposed human in Halloween Town, where most people had bones sticking out of rotting flesh. Cocking his head to one side, he made started his approach, but stopped short. What if this wasn't a human but some sort of scary poltergeist that would try and feast on his soul if he got to close? Then Sora felt the reassurance of the Keyblade at his side, and remember that scary things trying to devour his humanity were commonplace. Duh.

"Soooo...it's a nice night huh?" said the boy, in his dorky way. There was no way that he could possibly catch the attention of the cultured and feminine body in front of him, but hey! This was Sora, and he didn't know these sorts of things.

"..." the only reply he got was silence, which sounded an uncanny lot like Leon, which was strange, since silence doesn't sound like anything, and Sora wondered if maybe this was Leon's sister, and woah! Was that a gunblade?

"Is that a gunblade? I've got a friend who has one just like it!" Sora squealed, as he had now found a conversation starter.

"The Velvet Nightmare merely has the guise of a blade." the lady replied in a deep sinewy baritone. Great! Now they were really going somewhere!

"Oh. That's nice. I'm Sora. Who're you?" the boy with the pumpkin adorning his head said, flashing a toothy grin.

"...Yazoo." the voice remained steady and even. No tremulousness, no nothing.

"You've got really pretty hair Yazoo. It reminds me of that one guy in the Coliseum, what's his name..." Sora added, blushing, if anyone was to look. It was the keyblade masters experience that when you want to get on a girl's good side, compliment her. Or at least, that was what they did in films. Sora didn't have any experience with women aside from Kairi, and she was Kairi.

"Sephiroth. That's because he and I share the same Mother."

"Really? So you are somebody's sister..." excitedly he said, since his hunch had been right. Well...not quite, though.

"I'm no she." the woman, who was now identified as man, turned to the other party. Sora couldn't be sure, but he swore he saw a look of amusement twinkling in Yazoo's previously unseen green eyes. Cat-like, would be a good descriptor.

"Uh! I'm sorry! I didn't know! It's just you looked so pretty and stuff and-" Sora was cut off, as suddenly his head was being held gingerly but elegant fingers.

The kiss, although it only lasted 1.26 seconds, had every romantic notion ever found in a clichéd romantic women's paperback like the ones Sora's mother used to read crammed into it. It was as though their lips had known each other for all of existence...then of course the kiss stopped.

"Bwuh...?" said Sora. He was never very eloquent.

"I believe that was what you were angling for." Yazoo explained, the corners of his mouth twitching up into a smirk.

Sora stared.

"But aren't you a man?"

Yazoo simply laughed, and turned on his heel, the end of his leather coat flaring dramatically.

Authoress Notes:

SCREW KADORA! Sora/Yazoo is where the real action is. Blame Phoenix Tamer, this is all her fault. Together, we are a crack force to reckon with, coming up with stuff like Kayner, and Sozoo. Also, with this drabble I have proved I can write more than just hetero. Yay me. :D

Now, for the Omake segment, also courtesy of PT!

Cloud: So Sora, is it true Yazoo molested you behind some rose bushes?

Sora: No way man. It was entirely consensual.

Hoorah for shameless pretty boy fluff.


End file.
